Posts Tagged ‘Michael Phelps’

Potpourri (2 of 2)

August 28, 2008

More free association, this time around post-competition whoopie in the now empty Olympic Village and the crowning of that perfect Summer ’08 jam. Keep your arms and legs close to your body as you tumble further down the rabbit hole of my mind – it only gets weirder from here.

1) “You Sure You’re 16?” “Beijing Boom-Boom”

“Usain Bolt, you’ve just run the fastest 100m and 200m sprints in recorded history! What are you going to do now?” “I’m heading back to the Village and grabbing, like, 45 condoms. Then I’m going to have sex for two days!” “Heh-heh. But, uh, Disney World later – right, Thunder Bolt?” “If I can stand up straight. Really, I’ve got a pretty full schedule.” Honesty… pass it on. According to Matthew Syed of the London Times, the Olympic Village is a sex-fest on par with the naughtiest scenes in Caligula or Planet Earth. It makes sense. After months of carefully tuning their bodies for peak performance, athletes’ libidos are out of control. These are beautiful people, too (or at the very least, butterfaces or butHISfaces), marble sculpted men and women in the best shape of their lives. In an enclosed space. Far from home.

A swinging explosion is inevitable. More?

NY Times Says Phelps More Horse Than Man

August 13, 2008


He can and will eat your children.

He can and will eat your children.

People claim he’s from the future. That his body is the closest thing to a perfect swimming machine ever conceived. In the last two days, I’ve told friends that he’s “less a mortal being than a god on Mt. Olympus” and “someone who defies my (admittedly weak) understanding of physics.” The general sense is that Michael Phelps has graduated to a league entirely his own; that he can no longer be compared to any human athlete, alive or dead. The New York Times decided to kind of run with that idea. Read how after the jump!