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You Should Watch ‘7 Minutes in Heaven’

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Late night interviews have since the dawn of television (or before that, when the interviews just weren’t recorded) relied on a pretty traditional physical layout: desk for the host, couch or comfy chair for the guest, and a span of about two feet keeping appropriate distance between them. This has always felt right, and to suggest another arrangement was probably tantamount to treason.

But one day this summer ‘SNL’ writer Mike O’Brien — the guy most responsible for the Kickspit Underground Rock Festival sketches, or more simply: the person who dreamed up “Mrs. Potato Dick” — said ENOUGH. People should be interviewed in a cramped, claustrophobic setting! Standing uncomfortably close to one another! Maybe drunk! And with that a truly revolutionary interview show, ‘7 Minutes in Heaven,’ was born.

In what I’m guessing is his own closet but could very well belong to someone else, Mike chats up a guest — of either gender, it’s very progressive — plies them with alcohol of their choice, then goes in for the make-out kill. The show’s title is something of a lie when the interviews usually top out around four and a half minutes, but that’s okay! The tonsil hockey, however prudish (Hoda) or full-commitment (Patricia Clarkson), always delivers. And consider the show’s boundless future frenching potential: Adam Sandler…Roseanne…the cast of ‘CSI’. If I were Mr. O’Brien, I’d invest in a bulk pack of lip balm NOW.

There are tens of millions of talk shows out there, but right now only one that offers the kind of physical intimacy we need in these cold, troubled times. Don’t waste another YouTube minute not watching two strangers awkwardly kiss.

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