You’ve seen the Google tricks. You’ve noticed LF’s redecorating. Now behold the Queen mother of all pranks. In case you missed it, Prez Obama headed to the UK yesterday to rub elbows with the rest of the world’s greatest leaders to try to figure out the whole everyone-in-the-world-lost-their-job-and-savings-because-of-the-US thing. (Side note: Didn’t there used to be only 8 countries that mattered in the world… since when are there 20?! I mean I know Cuba’s been having a great year, but I don’t even know 20 people that I could trust with money, let alone 20 COUNTRIES!) But we didn’t elect no April’s Fool; the man came prepared. Obama ceremoniously presented the Queen with a SUPER special edition iPod: one with the yet to be released 2Pac comeback album and the entire Trick Daddy music video library video footage from her 2007 trip across the pond to America. Stacks on DECK, Barack… well played. But then the exchange turned volatile. CNN reports that the Queen then presented our commander in chief with “…a signed photograph of her and her husband, Prince Phillip, in a silver frame, her standard gift to foreign dignitaries.” Hey Obama: YOU JUST GOT PUNKED SON!
Imagine the forced endearing look in the Obamas’ eyes when they were handed matching wool socks after just giving the Queen a fucking PS3… after traveling across the world to get there. There hasn’t been a war between the US and UK in ages, but today may go down in infamy as the day the Queen took King George’s side. We got her an iPod, she played a practical joke on us. There’s only one way we can retaliate to reconcile this wrong-doing in my book: Apple must stop selling iPods in merry ol’ England. Sorry, no more listening to James Blunt in the “tube” or waiting in line for the “loo.” No more, “Say old chap, cheerio, what are you bloody listening to old boy?” Fair is fair, and after being afronted by the Queen we have to save some sort of face. If we don’t, the G20 talks will assuredly end with Sarkozy pointing out our inability to see the classic Queen prank coming our way. Sarkozy “Dude, EVERYONE knows about that one… how do you expect to foresee financial collapse in the future?” And Obama will have to bow his head in silence, because the truth is Sarkozy is right. NOW HOLD ON A MINUTE! I’m no frog myself… I think we should see how much they hate us if we don’t win a war for them next time they’re in a pickle, but seriously: iPod given, signed photo received? This is outrageous. I wish I could say this post was an AFD prank but the joke is on us, America. Next year, hopefully we’ll be bringing the monogrammed bath towel instead.