Oh… you forgot about Kanye? How could you? Even when his last album was so underplayed omnipresent on the radio? Whereas Dr. Dre would pen a hit song using only his best beats for himself Eminem, Mr. West need only be given a microphone and a camera to get the publicity wheels a turnin’ and the gossip blogs a spinnin’. This time, the venue was a taping for VH1’s Storytellers; a typically boring affair in which all your favorite musicians from the last few decades share their “secrets” about how songs were written. Spoiler alert: ‘Touch the Sky’ was about LSD!
According to a Yahoo! story, Kanye, when encouraged to expound upon his motivations for writing songs and being an asshole in general, took the time to trash frontman Thom Yorke of Radiohead while simultaneously defending people like Michael Jackson, O.J. Simpson, and Chris Brown. Under the OMG-I-forgot-to-pick-up-the-kids-from-school! saying: everyone makes mistakes, Kanye thought it relevant to discuss why he thinks these people deserve a break. I guess Rihanna was in the audience because she seems convinced. Touché Kanye, touché. I’m not sure which counts as the lesser of mistakes here though: Michael Jackson’s descent into a disturbing madness of child-touching and baby-dangling or Chris Brown’s alleged assault on Rihanna. (Note: there was reputedly so much blood in his car that they had to hold it as evidence.) I’ve made some mistakes in my life, as I’m sure most have, but I’m not quite prepared to welcome pedophilia or domestic violence into the socially accepted umbrella of mistakes. These typically include being late for a prom, locking your keys in your car, or forgetting someones birthday. Call me old fashioned, but if I felt guilty for making those mistakes, I’m not sure how I’d feel making the mistakes on Kanye’s list.
But I’m only serving West’s purpose by writing this. I need only type these words and press “Publish” to adhere to the tried and true publicity storm that is Kanye West. Do you think he really means what he says more than 50% of the time? I remember seeing an interview he did with MTV a few years back and I was shocked by the things he was saying. The only way I was able to sleep through the night was taking comfort in the fact that he spent just as much time preparing his pre-written, condescending bullshit as I did sleeping it off. For more, check out the Storytellers episode when it airs, but know that the final edit was probably something short of all the ego-stroking that’s fit to print.