Liked “Deep Impact”? Try “Deep Throat”!

by

Everyone with an Internet connection and a mailing address has a Netflix account. I mean everyone with an Internet connection has a Netflix account. I mean everyone has a Netflix account.

I Don't Get It, Either.

Don't worry, I don't get it, either.

Of course more often than not, the jump from old-school rentals (remember Blockbuster?) to Netflix’s program of instant gratification just means you watch more bad movies than usual. You really liked watching Enchanted with your family, so you figured A Cinderella Story would be a solid follow-up. From there you followed more Netflix recommendations, jumping deeper down the princess rabbit hole. Oops. Pretty soon your wife’s left you and your sons want to be costume designers. Oh, and you’ve lost your job (the economy). Thanks, Netflix!

While Netflix has a staggering library of titles to choose from, their recommendation algorithms (I don’t know what this is) are woefully ill-equipped to offer follow-up movie recommendations. Titles are lumped together based almost entirely on superficial criteria  like subject (“babies,” “America”) and casting similarities, not more nuanced considerations like tone, cinematography, or even genre. I sound like a douchebag, I know, but these things are important. You don’t want to be a f*cking plebeian for the rest of your life, do you? I need a cigarette.

picture-1Now there’s a solution to all your madcap online rental problems in Clerkdogs, a search database written for humans, by humans to help you settle on the perfect Tuesday afternoon Saturday night movie. Unlike Netflix, which uses something called “collaborative filtering” (I don’t know what this is, either) to get you recommendations, Clerkdogs’ selections come entirely from a dedicated staff of movie lovers and disgruntled former video store clerks. So you know it’s good!

While still in Beta testing, the site’s breadth is impressive. Type in almost any movie – try Point Break, for starters – and you’re a returned a list of possible matches. Select the “mash it” button at the top of the page and you can zero in even further on the kind of movie you’re looking for. Point Break, but with more dry humor and less action? In Bruges. Point Break, but with less violence and more romance? The African Qu

That’s probably not right. Still, their “match it” feature is pretty astounding and particularly useful if you’re jonesing for something to watch after overrated Oscar-nominated Slumdog Millionaire or Benjamin Button. May you never leave your couch!

(Thanks to regular reader Jeff Hull for the tip!)

Advertisements

Tags: , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: