Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself, My Name is H-

by

-enning. Barfoed Fog. You might remember me. I used to post things to this blog. A lot of it was about movies, television, or time-wasting Internet videos. Some of it chronicled my various misadventures. All of it was written with an eye toward humor, my tongue firmly in cheek. It can be difficult, then, to keep up that kind of consistent tone when you sometimes don’t feel that funny or happy.

“A man goes to the doctor. Says he’s depressed. He says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. The doctor says ‘the treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him, that should pick you up.’ The man bursts into tears. He says ‘but doctor… I am Pagliacci.’” – Watchmen

Not that I’m a) all that funny or b) all that depressed, just that from time to time I really don’t feel like myself. Or I just plain don’t like myself. I lose confidence, retreat to my room like Brian Wilson, and wind up playing Wii for what some might describe as “unhealthy amounts of time” (luckily binge-eating has yet to work its way onto the docket). When this happens, I tend to keep the experience to myself; remain in isolation until the skies have cleared. With no blog posts since last Wednesday, it will come as no surprise that this past week saw one of these self-esteem storms.

I’m realizing now, as I pick myself up, that while there’s nothing wrong with feeling blue every once in a while, it’s patently stupid to not seek out your friends when that feeling comes around. Friends are there to listen, to comfort, to remind you that life is good (it is). There is always someone there ready to help if you only seek them out. Sharing is caring.

With regard to this blog, I guess, it’s important that I recognize not every day is going to be filled with roses and daffodils. Try as I may, I’m just not going to have that famous Fog mojo all the time. Like the tide, it ebbs and flows. I accept that. But regardless of mood or situation, I need to write. That much is clear. To aim always for an enjoyable read, but accepting the occasional misfire. To stop hiding behind a facade of togetherness (if it was even there to begin with), to embrace my shortcomings and admit things I might consider embarrassing or shameful.

I may have just lost ten regular readers with that last paragraph. To anyone still following, I promise that despite this proposed marriage between entertainment and Henning-ness, I’m not about to take a turn into LiveJournal town. I will never bore you with the daily minutiae of my life, never whine without reason, never unpack my garbage onto your browser. Watch The Hills for all that. I just want to bring you writing and news that’s honest, filtered through the perspective of someone who’s slowly figuring things out. A friend¬†told me the other day that men’s development is roughly four years behind women; that I’m less 22 than I am a fresh-faced 18 year-old-old. Handsome as I’ll ever be, yeah, but naive. A work in progress. The blog’s named “Lifting Fog” for a reason, after all – while I still can’t see a significant chunk of the horizon, things are becoming clearer everyday. Visibility is improving.

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9 Responses to “Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself, My Name is H-”

  1. kishori Says:

    why so glum! we had bad sangria at our last meet-up, it would have been the key to a obtaining a warm and fuzzy glow. might not have helped with “lifting the fog”, though.

  2. Steve Says:

    there’s no need to be so hard on yourself, thats what assholes in the blogosphere are for. also, I meant to tell you, I’m thinking of a starting a new blog as I become more of an expert in the field I plan to write about. you can DEFINITELY be involved and I think you’ll like it, I’ll send you an email soon

  3. Jeff Says:

    after reading too many blogs at work today, i stumbled across this and thought you might find it interesting, only because maybe you would have submit some sort of similar college essay. might be worth revisiting your own, or any of your high school writing. I know my writing was about as ignorant as a 73 year old Nun’s.

    http://www.educatednation.com/2008/08/08/coolest-college-application-essay-ever-re-post/

  4. Henning Says:

    Thanks for the link, Jeff. I’m saddened to report that my college essays were pretty run-of-the-mill; lacking in the special spices department. One I wrote about open water swimming, another about an inspiring teacher – basically the shit any college prep guide will tell you has “selling” ability. I should have let my freak flag fly, baby. Ignorant like a 73-year-old nun? Give yourself more credit! And anyway, you could probably write a killer essay now… entirely in binary. I’d be impressed.

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  7. p Says:

    I totally believe that one should be allowed to feel blue once in a while, I agree with everything that I wrote until the last paragraph, but then I suppose I would

  8. Kasara Says:

    Full of salient points. Don’t stop bleiienvg or writing!

  9. Lifting Fog Fun Facts « Lifting Fog Says:

    [...] 9. To this day, DJ Steve is responsible for generating our most-ever traffic with his post on fictional tattoos, “What Tattoo is More Badass: Death Eater’s Dark Mark Symbol vs. Symbol of the Galactic Empire.” That thing constitutes 1/5 of all visits to Lifting Fog ever. Two days earlier Steve wrote another post, “What if Apple Created a Social Networking Application?” that landed us for the first and only time in WordPress’ “Freshly Pressed” gallery. Meanwhile I have written about such topics as People Magazine’s Baby Blog,¬†Shame, and mild circumstantial depression. [...]

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